Archive | August, 2012

They Say It’s Your Birthday

31 Aug

“And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.”
– Abraham Lincoln

Today, I am 24 years old. I’ve spent 24 years being so ecstatic that I could cry, and being so despondent that I actually have. I’ve met some amazing people who have brought great value and meaning to my life and let go of the people who want to bring me down. Thank you, if you are one of the people who has been amazing to me. You’ve given me a great birthday gift just by being wonderful! Within the past 5 years, I have really found a true zest for life and really appreciate everyday that I’m alive.

This birthday, I’ll be spending my time with my new Buffalo friends who understand my plight as a PhD student. They are pretty awesome. While this will not be my most “fun” birthday (unless you’re the type of person who gets really jazzed about reading and summarizing articles that deal with studying organizational behavior topics, such as leadership, with regards to context), it will be a memorable one. I don’t remember the last time I worked this hard and here’s to hoping I’ll have the stamina to make it through my first semester.

I’m a bit overwhelmed with all of the work I have (I actually questioned if I had eaten dinner and went to the restroom today… Scary. Don’t worry- I’m still showering and even wearing makeup!), but it is going to be *incredibly* worthwhile knowing that I have increased my research ability just a little bit more. I’m already coming up with ideas for papers that I know I will eventually have a honed skill set to help me see a potential study from start to finish. I can’t wait until I’m really good at this stuff.


And so, because it’s my birthday and I get to do whatever I want on my birthday (it’s Federal law – look it up), I’ll leave you all with a song. It’s the first song I listened to after midnight and my very favorite Pearl Jam song.

Enjoy 🙂


Mid-Week Music Moment: “The Piper’s Song (Aeroplane Tape Remix)” by Gypsy & The Cat

30 Aug

I know, this is a day late. I’m suuuuper busy learning today, but I felt obligated to share this song with the world. The original version of this song is really good too, but I heard this version first. It is currently my “Holy sh*t – they gave me HOW MANY readings this week? And I have a thought paper due? And I have 3 separate research assignments I’m on? And I’m taking 2 other classes with homework? I better start bustin’ ass and listen to a cool song while I’m knocking it out” song.

As with most of the new stuff I find, this song is currently on repeat. Because it’s

Happy Almost Friday!


30 Aug

IAMA PhD Student

29 Aug

(My fellow Redditors will get the reference 🙂 )

Sorry for dropping off the face of the earth recently – I’m currently in the middle of my first week as a PhD student at the University at Buffalo. Surprisingly, this city isn’t as awful as I thought it was going to be. There’s a hipster-y section that is really nice to go out and have fun in. Also, in comparison to the size of the city, Buffalo has a decent selection of interesting foods to go and try. The program is tougher and more rigorous than initially expected, but I’m just going to do what I have to do and power through. Improvise, adapt, overcome.

Here’s what I’ve learned so far:
– Toothpaste studies are known for being done in prisons because they have a population that they can track over a long period of time.
– ASQ articles are really dry and boring.
– Getting a PhD in Management and OB is, so far, mastering the ability to read the English language until your eyeballs fall out. Seriously though, I’ve read more in the last week than I’ve read in the last 5 months. No rest for the wicked.
– Working in a coffee shop works for me. The music, other people’s conversation, and the coffee machine noises all blend together to create a white noise that actually helps me read and comprehend what I’m reading.

I’ll keep trying to update on a semi-regular basis to let everyone know that I haven’t just crawled in a corner to die or anything like that. Also, I’m hoping that continuing my creative writing will allow me to become a better scientific author, because really, if you look at it, writing academically is writing creatively. You have to come up with a way to express your idea about a topic in a way that is engaging for someone else to read.

I have a sweet MWMM that I wanted to post last week, but couldn’t due to my moving to a different zip code. I’ll try and post that today 🙂

Guess What I’m Doing Right Now…

22 Aug


Gypsies, Tramps, and Thieves

20 Aug

“Your Gypsy Name is Philana, meaning Loving”

Childish Gambino got his rap name from a Wu Tang Clan  name generator, so I thought I could find my gypsy name that way. I have been a gypsy this summer. 

If you remember, I traveled all around the Northeast and Midwest this summer. When I left Philly (the first time) my odometer read 73,338. Currently, back home in Upstate NY, my odometer says 82,123. That’s right – I’ve driven almost 10,000 miles this summer! Here is an outline of my adventures:

  1. Philly to Home – goodbye Villanova!
  2. Home to CBus – started my new internship 🙂
  3. CBus to Home – Tayls and John got married!
  4. Home to Philly – yeah… I still had a *lot* of stuff left there… (Thank you for your help, Josh!!!)
  5. Philly to Home – my mom’s garage is now the proud holder of all my sh*t.
  6. Home to CBus – gotta finish my internship!
  7. CBus to Chicago – Lollapalooza, bitches!
  8. Chicago to CBus – wow, I am exhausted…
  9. CBus to Home – what??!?! Do I *have* to go???

And now, number 10: Home to Buffalo. Buffalo is going to be my home for the next 4 years (…oh boy…). I’ll be packing up all of my earthly belongings (again!) and moving to Buffalo on Wednesday. I’ll be honest – I’m not particularly fond of the city, but I know that I’ll meet some great people and learn some great things. Also, they say it’ll take 4 years, but I’m going to do everything in my power to finish it sooner. I’m not getting my hopes up, but I’m going to work harder than a one-armed wallpaper hanger. I’ll work harder than a one-legged man in a butt-kicking contest. I don’t know why all of my working analogies have an appendage missing… I need to work on that.

Just know that when I go on the job market in 3 years, I’ll be looking to move back to the Midwest 🙂

20 Aug

Fall is such a great season 🙂

Running Outside is Awesome / It’s a Cute Overload

18 Aug

I have found 2 panaceas for having a **blerg** day. Running and the Internet.

I woke up feeling sh*tty today.

  1. Because I had only put a small dent in the packing I needed to do.
  2. I’m leaving tonight and my Buckeye State adventures are over (until next summer? :)).
  3. The person with whom I’ve spent every weekend this summer, except for two, has already left Ohio.
  4. I can’t bring my dog with me to Buffalo. She really is the best dog ever.

However, remember when I wrote about feeling sh*tty before? That’s right. I ran like a mad woman. I ran like I stole something and I was being chased. And you know what? It felt AWESOME. I ran in the park that I pass everyday on my way to work. It’s so cute there. I turned on some hip-hop and just ran.

The best thing I’ve found about running is that you can’t feel anything but peace and exhaustion. I was thinking about the above list, but I couldn’t be sad. My legs started to get tired, but I couldn’t be upset with the world. I’m still running on some of that high right now. If you don’t live in an area that lends itself to outside running, I highly suggest you find a park or something similar like I did. It’s 1,000 times better than running on a treadmill.

And now for the Internet. I swear the Internet was created for cute things. Have you seen how many pictures of Corgis, Poodles, and other freakin’ adorable puppies exist?? Allow me to demonstrate:

So cute!

Poodle puppy! This is what Puppet looked like when she was smaller.

Look at them! They’re so happy!!

Even though these pictures are heart-warming, add some babies and throw it in a video, and you have Internet gold. Whenever I hear a baby laugh, I can’t help but feel a little bit of joy start to bloom. One of my favorite technology blogs, Mashable, has compiled the 10 best infectious YouTube clips of babies laughing at dogs. Please click the link to watch all 10 videos and enjoy them as much as I did.

Here’s one:


“Save Your Tears For The Bathroom” / Things I Learned This Summer

16 Aug

My advisor gave the advice above to us in one of my first grad school classes (shout out G$L!).

Full disclosure: I cried last night. I cried this morning. However, I’ve gone through an entire work day and haven’t cried yet. I don’t plan on “losing my sh*t” for the rest of the day.

“But Beezy, why are you so sad?” Thanks for inquiring, friend.

It started with an email. A fairly harmless beginning, one would assume. The email came from a blog I subscribe to, letting me know that they had put together what they claimed to be an all-encompassing list of the best apps for back-to-school. Sh*t. I should probably start thinking about that.

So I did, which meant that I should probably recharge my iPad. I haven’t touched it in 2 months and it was dead-er than Ryan Lochte’s potential career as a particle physicist. As soon as it had enough juice to come back to life, I updated my neglected piece of technology and sat down to add the new apps that were supposedly sure to help with my education. Hey, if it’s free, I’ll give it a go. I had it in my hands and felt an odd sensation: I’m going back to my old routine.
“NO!,” I thought. “After being in CBus for so long, I’ve developed a new way of doing things; my new routines are better! I don’t want to start over AGAIN.”

And then I thought for a really long while.

I thought about how my experiences here have really transformed me into the person I want to become. I now go to bed at an appropriate hour and am early to rise and start my day. I’ve learned that I’m more productive in the morning and that I dislike the feeling of wasting the day away in bed. I like my new bed and my new bedtime routine and how often I go to the gym. I want to keep all those things and I know how hard it is to transport it all.

Moving from Philly, it was easy to give up my former routines because they were unhealthy and difficult to transport to CBus. It was so easy to start over. When I was in Philly, I was in an, um, interesting relationship. I felt dead for the most of it, I’m not going to lie. Just going through the motions. It started when he cheated on me, and I – unlike the strong, confident woman I would have liked to be – took him back. After that, I forgot what it was like to really feel something special for another person – and that I should be valued in whatever relationship I’m in. My work suffered. My personal well-being suffered.

Until I ended it. That was the beginning of my rebirth, if you will. I started some new routines that I was able to bring with me (like blogging more frequently, spending more time with friends, taking charge of my health and wellness, etc.) and surrounded myself with people who were supportive of my new way of life.

I think one of the reasons I’m so upset is the fact that I can’t take people with me to Buffalo: The people who have listened to me, given me advice, went on fun adventures with me, shared their successes and failures, and taught me how to be a good friend and person. I know I’m not saying “Goodbye” – just “See you later.” They make phones and Skype and cars and airplanes for a reason. I know I’m going to meet new people who are going to make my experience fantastic, but I’m still in that “I’m scared for the first day of school” stage.

Uncertainty and ambiguity make me uncomfortable. I do my best with them when I can, but if I am given the opportunity to gain some clarity and solidify some things, you better believe I’ll jump all over it.

Besides the whole “having to uproot once again” thing, I’ll be honest, I’m sad that Josh left last night. I’m glad that I got to spend as much time as possible with him, but still sad that this concludes our Columbus adventures. For now, of course :). I’m always eager to visit a new state and I’ve never been to the Dakotas before. He’s a really special person that makes me feel really special too. You can tell that I like him.

For now, I’m going to go home, continue packing my things, and rock out to some sweet, sweet tunes. But first, my department is throwing me a going-away party tonight. I’m going to eat pizza, and laugh, and enjoy my last Thursday night here. I’m sure I’ll have some more “upbeat” posts when I actually start as a doctoral student, but for now, thanks for allowing me to work some things out. 🙂



Throwback Thursday: “Down On The Corner” by Creedence Clearwater Revival

16 Aug

“Tap your feet” indeed, CCR.

And, of course, in my true former-a-cappella-member fashion, here is Streetcorner Symphony from “The Sing Off” performing a cover: