An Open Letter to the Best Waffle I’ve Ever Eaten

7 Aug

Dear Waffle –

We met too long ago – a couple of weekends ago actually. We found where you live in North Market and happened to grab a sample when Josh and I walked by. It was love at first bite and I knew that I had to come back for more.

We eventually returned and I enjoyed a double serving of your sugary deliciousness. I was confused and amazed at the same time. “Holy sh*t! Why does this waffle taste like I’m high-fiving a million angels?” “How do they caramelize the sugar on the outside?” “Did I sign what’s left of my soul away for the opportunity to eat this waffle?”

You’re the best of both worlds – a breakfast item that moonlights as a delightful dessert. I have to see you again, but here’s the problem. I’m committed to another. You see, I bake quite frequently and I have some cheesecake bites in my fridge that are just sitting there waiting to find a home in my tummy. I can’t just kick homemade cheesecake like that to the curb, nor can I just shove all of the delicious treats into my mouth like Takeru Kobayashi in hopes that they won’t go to waste (well, I *could* but that’s not really enjoying food-love, now is it?).

I’m moving to Buffalo in a few weeks. You’re here in Columbus. However, I saw on your website that I can buy you and have you shipped to my new home in “Queen City of the Lakes”. I think this long-distance relationship can really work. We can visit Niagara Falls as I pop you in the microwave put a heaping scoop of Velvet vanilla ice cream on top of you. We can run the 5K I’m doing in December (you’ll be in my stomach, as I will have eaten you for breakfast that morning). The possibilities are endless.

When I think of you, I think of a famous quote by the great Leslie Knope: “We need to remember what’s important in life: friends, waffles, work. Or waffles, friends, work. Doesn’t matter, but work is third.”

Waffle, I am a better person having met you. You are a f*cking delicious delight.





One Response to “An Open Letter to the Best Waffle I’ve Ever Eaten”

  1. GSL August 8, 2012 at 7:35 am #

    Well-played meme:)

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